Stubbish

Ecstacy reduced lexicon: that part of the brain for
cheesing like a Swiss high on Alps yodeling.  Death to the
white light!  …And towards the chalk on the boards of a
school (iGand).  Glasses aye me, starved for approval, my elders
enable me to nerd.  Off. And on to the break of dawn
wetting the house soaking in light: swimming substance
of seeing that can’t be seen.  Gilt by association, nobles
have faith in each other, the guild that peaks and crests
symbols on to shields that protect me from the onslaught
against me that seeks to rip my soul from my body, high on
pretend ego that associates scenes I see for myself in a
dream, vision, and selfish aspersion.  As I self-efface
contradictorily to seem a certain way, I age myself
for a smiling austerity, giving tax for favor.

Robber barons soldier for fortune in the same soul-sucking
city for years full of idiots about, that is, until they get
wise or I slip up.  Society daughters give themselves up
for a fatherly dicking or talking-to.

“Lecture me daddy, oh! Tell me all about your failed rehearsals
of applied hindsight and how it wrinkled your brow and
made you lose faith and gain weight!  Do me righteous!
Oh! Lip me prudent like the whore that I am not!  Thwart
my dirty little urges, yearnings, and compulsions to feel good and
get knocked up, and be bopped around!  Make me a smiling
professional in a suit who writes letters and makes demands
that may or may not be rational nor has be, but needs
to be taken as seriously as I didn’t take my education.”

“Give credit where credit’s due? Give credit where credit has always been.
To our founding white fathers, to God! Because God is a bearded
figure of a man, as depicted on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel
that I have a vague notion of what it’s actually like, and it’s
of vague interest, but not interesting enough to give up what
it is I’m doing now in my careering life, rushing headlong
for the rush I’ve achieved over-and-over again and yet…
I’m still in search of…something…missing…the arrangement…
(the wedding).”